Crashing Waves of Instability | Aug.28.2022
Longing for a truth that soothes my soulA lingering feeling that glues me whole.
Looking through shattered pieces of maybes and doubt
I hear the echoes of memories replaying aloud
All the different routes that I could’ve taken
All the times I have navigated forsaken
Unharmed, yet strong winds thrown against my way
Will I keep my anchor or be swayed into decay?
Shattered pieces of fallen memories flashback
as I am in the midst of this wide-open sea
I painfully await the stroll down memory lane
as I negotiate to a higher power and plea.
Each memory pulling me strongly in an opposing direction
Stretching me beyond my limits of comprehension
One towards the past and one to a shinier ahead
Overwhelming when all I wanted is to feel safe and led.
Do I retrace my steps to relive a familiar moment and risk my statue morphing into salt?
Do I do all in my power to rewind, fix what is shattered and solely admit fault?
or subtly cut ties and start over to chase another unknown ending?
Do I fast-forward to pursue what lies ahead and pending?
Uncertainty… it is knowingly spiraling me into the ocean waves adrift
But maybe, it’s clearing my path, paving my way as it forces me to make this shift
Patience is my weakest virtue but in the sea of doubt, as they say, time will tell
Until then, I will hold on to my anchor and fall not under the ocean’s spell .
Maybe there is comfort in the unknown and in surrendering your sail
Maybe there is comfort in knowing things will work out even if you fail
Maybe this is preparation about fearlessly letting go and just giving in
cuz sometimes when you are not trying too hard, you might just win.
Yes, easily shaken yet grounded in place,
My anchor I will hold on to tightly and embrace
For I know, the waves will slow down,
the horizon will clear up and I will swim again to the shore
I will even walk on water if that’s what I am called for.
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